This is a guest post by Ashley Ambirge, author of the famous Middle Finger Project and beautiful life expert. {Yes that’s her in the picture below.} I invited her to post on my blog to share her vision of living beautifully in hopes that her words will inspire you to live a life that you feel is beautiful. In light of her new book and the approaching new year, I believe this is perfect timing. You can visit Ash’s blog for more worl-rocking, soul-shakingly good inspiration and check out her new book here.

Typically, when we think of beauty we imagine the red-lipped woman who confidently struts down a New York sidewalk in her best heels, her long brown hair swaying back and forth behind her, along with all of the men she leaves speechless along her path.

Typically, when we think of beauty we imagine bold, breathtaking artwork that speaks to our souls in just the right way, that we just know we have got to have it.

Typically, when we think of beauty we imagine a vivid blue sky & a garden of bright orange tulips that run for miles beneath it.

Typically, when we think of beauty, we think of sexy aesthetics.

But there’s another kind of beauty—one that we often overlook because it isn’t tangible beauty, but rather, is a beauty that comes in the form of peace, of soul and of validating self-love.

It’s the beauty of living up to your potential.

So often, as we rush around in this life, trying to meet everyone’s demands, the days start to turn into weeks, the weeks into months, the months into years, and before we know it, we’ve woken up one day to wonder, “My goodness, where did the time go?”

It’s rare that we take a time out & ask ourselves hard, but valuable questions such as whether or not we actually are living up to our potential, or whether we’re just lettting life pass us by, and hanging on as tight as we can in the meanwhile.

But we should be asking ourselves these questions, because it’s only by asking the question that we can ever arrive at an answer.

And if the answer is no—that we aren’t living up to our own potential—then we’ve got to make some changes, and fast, because the beauty that lies behind our own potential is so well worth it, in every sense.

Because when we aren’t, we’re bound to experience prolonged feelings of anxiety, angst and disappointment—sometimes without ever knowing why.

And there’s nothing beautiful about that.

For me, I’ve been fortunate to have found my potential through creative entrepreneurialism—I write, I blog, I connect, and I make my living by doing so.

For years, I worked in corporate America, disillusioned with every single moment of it. I remember sitting at my desk at my very first job, looking out the window and thinking, “Is this it? Is this what I’ve worked my entire life for? This?”

But that’s where I thought my potential was. That’s where I had been taught my potential was. That’s where I had been falsely led to believe my potential was—through years of schooling, teachers, parents and the media, all telling me that I could do “be somebody” and do “big things.” Unfortunately, “being somebody” and doing “big things,” to them, meant surrendering myself to the system, working in the name of someone else’s profit, and generally doing what I was told, from now until the day I retire.

Looking back, I should have been insulted that this was all of the potential that anyone ever saw in me. Because to me, knowing what I do now, none of that is much of an accomplishment. That isn’t potential; that’s the equivalent of playing Monopoly everyday. You know the steps you have to take to succeed, and you take them without ever really thinking about it. At best, it’s a simulation.

I needed more from life.

I needed more from me.

I needed to start tapping into my own potential

if I ever hoped to do anything meaningful.

And as I started experimenting with what things made me feel ALIVE—what made my heart beat a little faster, what made me jump out of bed ready to throw punches at the world, and what made me proud of myself—I soon realized that writing & blogging & sharing my ideas with the world was that thing.

Admittedly, it took some time before I was able to accept this as a valid career path—as something that I could legitimately turn into a business, and learn to make a living doing what I loved—but once I wholeheartedly made the decision to go forth & give my all to the world, the world didn’t hesitate to reward me for doing so.

Ah, the beauty of potential.

I now look forward to each day, and can’t wait to begin “work.”  I feel as if I truly am working toward my potential, and I feel as if I’ve just barely scraped the tip of the iceberg.

And it feels amazing.

This feeling is hard to describe—it’s a mix of passion, of pride, of excitement and of relief—but most of all, the best way to describe it is simply as beautiful.

There’s a powerful, untapped beauty that lies in striving to live up to one’s potential, and while we may not be able to see it, like we can a mysterious red-lipped woman, a piece of artwork or a field of orange tulips, that doesn’t matter because one thing is for sure: We can FEEL it.

And at the end of the day, that’s really what beauty comes down to in its most basic form, doesn’t it?

I know many of you are bloggers, crafters, freelancers, or have a little business on the side. Most of you would like to know how to make a full-time living off this. Because of that and the fact that this post has been so popular, I’m going to share a little bit on how I’ve been doing this for myself.

My Personal Madness

A little over a year ago, I’d just been fired from a job I hated. I shouldn’t have stuck around there so long, but it was safe. The job market sucked when I got out of college, and I’m a single parent. I was thinking of law school, but I’d heard the horror stories of lawyers who went straight to law school only to find they hated being a lawyer when they got out. So, I got a job at a law firm, quickly realizing that I did NOT want to be a lawyer. Instead of quitting, I kept the job. Be happy to have a job, right. So when I got fired it was a HUGE relief, but it was also ridiculously stressful due to those things we like to call bills. I didn’t have anything liquid {like an emergency fund}, and I had a load of debt.

Lucky for me, I’d started this blog and had experience in marketing and event planning. I offered ads here and sold a bunch of stuff I didn’t need or had never worn. Thinking back to a conversation with Lisi, I looked for work as a writer. I also picked up a gig with a big entrepreneurship conference in Miami, where I met some amazing people. All this helped me cover the bills while I started offering my services as a freelance writer and social media specialist.

Fast forward to today. I’m a full-time freelance writer, social media specialist, and consultant with a variety of clients, one of my most frequent being a Fortune 100 company. I donate my spare time and services to a really cool charity. I’ve written and had a book published. I’m in the process of writing another book. I’m not rolling in dough, but I’m making just as much as I did at that job I hated. I’ve managed to pay off most of my debt, have an emergency fund, and now have a retirement fund. I work fewer hours, and I do it from wherever I want, which means more time with my son and a more comfortable wardrobe.

And, you’re saying “That’s great, but how does this help me?”

So here is where I tell you the super helpful stuff. I read through plenty of blogs and books out there that helped inspire me, some of which you will find in that post I mentioned above. However, if I had to tell you to pick just one, I’d tell you to go for Chris Guillebeau’s Unconventional Guides and $100 Business Forum. For someone looking to start a very small business {full-time or on the side}, I think his stuff is the best. I was part of his and Pam Slim’s first group of $100 business students and it was amazing. I’m applying everything I learned to a current project that is set to launch next year, and it’s helped keep me focused.

I believe in his products so much that I’m offering 15% off any service on this page to anyone who purchases anything from the Unconventional Guides.

If you’re interested, but still not 100% sold on the idea, keep reading. {FYI: There’s another discount at the end of the post.}

Continue reading →

1. Instead of grumbling about what you don’t like, try this:

2. End the day before a bit earlier. That way you can wake up earlier, which means you won’t rush and be in a pissed off mood.

3. Let there be light. Picture it: You wake up all on your own. No annoying ring or cell phone going off. It’s quiet and just bright enough. Doesn’t that sound pleasant? Here’s the thing. Our bodies are made to respond to cues like warmth and light to raise us from sleep. If you’ve gotten an adequate amount of sleep (at least 6 hours), then it’s very likely that you can get used to waking up without an alarm clock.

If you’re in the market for a new alarm clock, there are some light emitting versions that mimic daybreak, slowly emitting more light to help you wake up. Don’t want to spend the cash? Put a lamp on a timer and set it to turn on about 15 minutes before your alarm clock goes off.

4. Now that you’ve woken up a bit earlier, make sure to do something for yourself.

5. Create an environment of good vibes in the morning. No screaming {unless you’re into cheering in the morning… that works, too}, no TV, no nagging. If you must, give yourself 5 minutes to check for emergency e-mails or weather reports online. That’s it. No more. Instead, of paying attention to all the noise clutter and info clutter that can swamp our mornings, take time to be present in what you’re doing. Sitting, eating, cooking… Look out the window. Look at your family. Talk to your cat. Whatever does it for you.

6. Work on one task at a time at work. The world isn’t likely to end if you don’t check your e-mail every 5 minutes. Pick a task. Get it done. Move on.

7. Hit your refresh button. Shift your position. Focus on nothing. Focus on a different sense. Go outside if you can. If you can’t do this at your current job, then it’s time to fire your job.

8. Avoid people with bad behaviors. Unless you’re the type that never picks up anyone’s habits, say goodbye. Studies have shown that we really are who our friends are. If you hang out with smokers, you’re more likely to pick up the habit. Trying to lose weight? Hanging around friends who are heavier will actually increase your chances of being heavier, too. On the flipside, if you’re a strong personality who tends to be the influencer, your presence can benefit those with bad habits.

9. Do everything as slowly as you can. ALL. DAY. LONG.

10. Don’t watch TV, or skip a day on the internet.

11. Get rid of something you aren’t using. Throw it in the garbage or donate it. Don’t even let yourself think twice about it. Just do it.

12. Tell someone you care about that you love them, even if they won’t say it back. Love is something that isn’t meant to be bottled up and crushed inside of us. It turns into a weight, a burden, when we do. So let it go. Write it or say it, just let them know.

13. Make room for playtime. It’s in our nature to play. Play is a form of communication, learning, and expression that is clearly visible in childhood. Somewhere along the line, we tend to have this inclination beaten out of us, er, I mean, we “mature.” I’m not sure where the idea that being playful is bad for adults came about, but I think it’s bollocks. {Yes to British terminology!}

Play leads to creativity. It relaxes us. It can challenge us. So, whether it be kickball, coloring, pretend {my favorite} or puzzles, make a little room for it in your schedule.

14. Speaking of making room in your schedule: Don’t overplan. Don’t box yourself in like that!

15. While you’re at it, get rid of the words try, but, and perhaps. Replace them with do, yes, and no.

16. Do something to make your home more sensual.

17. Be like buddha. Take time to acknowledge the thoughts that flow through your mind and then let them pass. Be aware of yourself, physically. This will lead to an awareness of your inner divinity. Doesn’t matter what religion you practice, if any. It works for everyone.

18. Ponder an aspect of nature. Rain, currents, wind, life, soil… Pick something and thoroughly explore it. Turn it over in your mind {or in your hands, if you can} and wonder.

19. Give yourself authority. You’re in charge of your own actions. You are important. It’s up to you to take care of yourself and to know yourself. You can make decisions. Don’t just ask for suggestions; give them. Fight for what you want, even if you lose. Be enthusiastic.

20. Do something without expecting anything in return. Not keeping score will free you.

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